The concept of a pvp-type realm is to have the possibility of constant danger out in the world, players constantly being at odds with each other. Choosing to flag yourself isn't being taken by surprise, and it is an option very few utilize as can be seen very plainly if you ever played on such a realm on official servers. And it would seem to be a hard concept, actually, since you are unwilling to accept any points of view other than your own narrow one, and then insist on the world around you changing to your whims. I'm sorry, but that's not how things work around here. In fact, life in general doesn't work that way.